Idlemind - nickcoster.com

Work wouldn’t be so hard if actually felt that I wasn’t doing what I believe in alone. But all I can think of are the possibilities that we can achieve. I want to be able to get a message from someone anywhere I am. I want any interface that I use to tell me that there is a message from someone that I care about waiting for me.

These are the thoughts that screw with my head. And yet I find myself fighting to get a person officially authorised to talk to me about a small part of the implementation of the idea. I need a believer. I need an evangelist. I don?t know if I can be that evangelist. Too much doubt.

I have been thinking, as well, about fear and what it prevents me from doing. On one hand I am in a good position to be able to present my message. I think that I am just afraid that no one will agree.

I guess all that I have to do is think back to every other idea that I have had, that I have been quiet about and then seen someone else carry out successfully. There is no point having the ideas if I can only keep them to myself. I think that if I can write and write and write, like a room full of monkeys the result will appear before me. But first I need to write.

I want to write about ?the value of data?, the ?amazing power of email and why it?s existence is threatened by Spam?.

Maybe the next action that I take will be about Spam. The value of data is not my problem anymore. God, how I wish it was. I just want the ideas to be set free?

Bugga! Not doing too well for my first few days of the writing pact. And I just missed the midnight cutoff time. oh well i’ll just have to write even more. goodnight.

Well I have just finished watching the Animatrix DVD. I now know where the kid in ?Reloaded? comes from. That was bugging me, mainly because it was deliberately left unexplained in the movie because of the tie into the animated works. Despite this obvious desire to hook more bucks out of the matrix loving consumer I still loved the DVD. I’ll definitely need it to add to the DVD collection.

The whole matrix theme has left me thinking very philosophical thoughts lately. Like the difference between the physical ?me? who is physically typing this text and the virtual ?Me? that is thinking these words and thoughts. Are they the same? Do they have to be? How can you ever know?

To me this is one of the fundamental questions the matrix movies presents. What happens if you CAN separate the two ?me?s? into real and virtual? Or maybe another way of thinking of it is just how much control over do the me?s have over each other?

In some respects the same can be boiled down to a single human. Thinking of the body as just a machine and the mind as the virtual human, the two are symbiotic, needing each other for survival. Then one of the other questions that is asked in ?Reloaded? is about which is really in control. If the mind is in control then why can we not over rule pain and hunger and fatigue. If the body is in control then de we actually have free will or are we the result of complex bio-mechanics?

It is with these thought that I will sleep with tonight.